Indulging in fantasies and sharing them with your partner contributes to hotter lovemaking and greater intimacy. Fantasy sexual role play can take you deeper into another character and release you from the restrictions you put on yourself in your daily life. It means more preparation and more risks or excitement. Most people start out a bit shy and nervous with the idea of dressing up as someone else and playing a role. This is due to the lack of preparation. So how do you bring fantasies to your lovemaking?
Here are some of the needed elements for any sexual role play scenario:
(a) Choosing a fantasy role character
(b) The scenario for acting out the sexual fantasy
(c) Dressing up for the role
(d) The motivation behind the character
(e) Basic rules for the sexual role play
(1) Choosing a fantasy role character
Picking a sexual fantasy role that suits you is the 1st key requirement. Think back to the old movies, comics and stories you loved as a kid. From Spiderman to Zorro, from Porky Pig to big bad wolf, the stories that stay with us from our childhood can create deep resonance in our sexual role play.
The fantasy role may not be related to any specific person such as the role of naughty student, the angel or a god. Most of us have fantasized about sex with rock stars, celebrities and everyday heroes. You can incorporate them into fantasy sex role play with your partner. Your sexual role play may not be a person at all. Maybe you want to be an alien or The Terminator. As much as you can, be experimental, outlandish and do not feel embarrassed or ashamed of the roles you want to explore.
Another way to generate some ideas to come up with a fantasy role character is to find out about some female sex fantasies. According to Isabella Snow, a sex education correspondent, the top female sex fantasies are domination (she is dominating you or you are dominating her), teacher/student, sex with a stranger, threesome with another woman, threesome with two men, voyeurism, rape, exhibitionism and private dancer.
(2) The scenario for acting out the sexual fantasy
Add some more details can help you to get deeper into a sexual role play scenario. The details can be about the type of physical setting (indoor or outdoor, or a big, small, dark, brightly lit room), whether this happens at day or night, any people nearby or just you alone at a totally secluded space, why you are present at the scene and what is going to happen.
(3) Dressing up for the role
Props and costumes for the role play can include clothing (from your underwear to your overcoat, school uniform, nurse uniform, a suit or tuxedo, torn or tattered clothes), wearable accessories (spectacles, leather gloves, ties or stockings, jewelry, purses, broaches, hats, belts, perfume or anything that smells like the particular role you are acting in), accessories for the role (briefcases for business people, rulers for teachers, handcuffs for policeman).
(4) The motivation behind the character
Ask yourself these questions:
(a) What are the things that motivate your imaginary character
(b) What are the things that turn on/off your role play character
(c) What is the personality of the character – dominant, submissive or mixed personality
(d) What is the history of this imaginary character
(e) Does the role play character has any hidden fantasy and what can bring this particular fantasy to the surface
(5) Basic rules for the sexual role play
Some of these rules should be common sense and common courtesy such as no laughing at your partner for something he/she or do and no judging each other in the moment.
Consider the following factors before you add further rules:
(a) What are the things you want or do not want to do when you dress up as someone else
(b) How do you want your partner to know when things do not work our or if you want to end it
(c) What do you need to feel comfortable in the role play character and is it possible to get your partner to fulfill your need?